Vida. Risa. Amor.

I'm annoyed with the public school system right now....not so much the education...but what the teenage girls are learning from each other there. My daughter didn't want to go to school today because of her stress of not getting her hair to style right, a skin breakout, and not having anything good to wear. In her mind she thinks she looks awful...I of course don't agree, and think she looks perfectly fine, but my opinion matters very little at the moment.

I let her sleep in today because I know her schedule is ridiculous with homework, school, and coming home late from soccer practices...and the girl just needs more rest! Trying to convince a hormonal 14 year old girl to spend less time in the mirror in both the evening and morning, and instead try taking more time to sleep is next to impossible. I get it, becaues I've been through Jr. High once and ruined my fair share of the ozone layer with Aqua Net. Today the styles are luckily more "natural", though straightening a whole head of hair still requires a lot of time...it's as if the days begin and end with hair-styling.

So we decided to go through her t-shirt selection and found out in detail what was wrong with each and every shirt..."the sleeves are too short, the V-neck is too low, I don't fill that one out yet, that one makes me look like a box, the color is ugly".....blah, blah, blah. And during all this my 4 year old son decided he wanted to model each of his long sleeved shirts for us. I couldn't convince him to change into a short sleeve shirt since I kept telling him he'd be hot and sweaty...and so he joined my daughter in the "I don't like any of my t-shirt's sobfest". I was literally having the same exact argument with my 14 and 3 year old. I was up to my elbows in piles of shirt.

A few minutes later I came back to find them shooting nerf darts onto the ceiling fan together. When the "darts hit the fan"....you know it's a good idea to just go ahead and take the day off.

What if I took a "day off" of housework?

What if I didn't wash the dishes tommorrow? What if I just let everything in my kitchen land where it falls and just leave it there? What if I left the box of cheerios that was spilled on the carpet? What if I left the clothes in the washing machine for a few days without throwing them in the dryer? What if I let the laundry pile up? What if I let the weeds actually grow in the yard? What if...

Though I want to try let everything go, atleast just for a day...a part of me is scared to find out that no one will actually care or miss that I mainly take care of these things for them. I guess we all crave recognition and appreciation. I also worry that I'm too much of a clean freak to let 20 minutes pass without wanting to straighten things out...maybe that's even scarier.

A major concern has been brought to my attention...and it worries me a little: Am I really a better person for keeping things clean?
Does it really matter?

I enjoy taking care of our home for my family, but I'm worried I've allowed it to define me. I've filled out so many forms in the past year at doctors offices and schools and the part still confuses me when I write "stay-at-home-mom" for mother's occupation. Of course there's a thousand ways to define this "job", and I've found it to be a privelage...but I think there have been days where I've buried myself in busy housework so that I don't have to think too long on the reality that some parts of being a "stay-at-home-mom" is just, well, boring.

I've been so busy making sure everyone else is okay and keeping the house clean that a lot of time has passed to the point where I know I haven't put a lot of thought into what my dreams are or were. I thought I knew. This might be why I need to get out and run 8 miles every week...I guess I'd prefer be fit and confused instead of fat and confused! It's hard to have your kids look to you for answers when there's a lot of unanswered questions I have for myself. I think it's okay to say and admit "I don't know" sometimes, but when I'm telling them they can do or be whatever they put their heart into, then why don't I?

My heart is my family & home right now. La ama de mi casa. Maybe someday there will be something else. I suppose these are the parts of my life that God is reminding me that I need Him. If I had my life figured out and knew for a fact that everything I was doing was exactly what I was meant to be doing, then I guess I would start to think I wouldn't need Him much. A favorite verse I fall back on often is in Proverbs 3: 5-6:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and lean not on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
and He will make your paths straight.

So maybe it's okay to like to straighten things...because God sure wants to make my paths straight...and I'm sure I'll always need a lot of straightening out!

Sometimes when it rains it pours....and it's a given that there are weeks when I'll feel like I'm in a little over my head...but when I'm there, I know it's probably a good idea to call up one of my "back-up Mom's". I am so blessed to have different groups of friends to balance me out when I'm feeling like I'm close to falling off of an emotional rollercoaster. If it's anything I'm learning as a Mom these days, it's that I don't have all the answers, and I need all the advice I can get.

I remember when I first moved here, I had a mini sobfest one summer afternoon thinking I was the loneliest loser Mom in Arizona. In Illinois I used to know all my neighbors and there weren't stone fences to block you from just saying "hello" and grass in the front yards that would welcome the kids to play on. July in Arizona's 117 degree weather makes it almost impossible to get to know your neighbors. But I can remember sensing God teaching me to just trust Him and wait...and 7 years later, I feel more than blessed with all the wonderful Mom-friends I now have in my life.

I love all my conmadres...my Mom friends. Ones that I can laugh about having teenage girls and advice on boyfriend issues. Moms of boys that get they are naturally wild and crazy. Moms that are prettier than me: they remind me to style my hair more often...and shower. Restaurant-wife-Moms. Happy-hour-preschool-fun-Moms. Smarter-than-me-about the bible Moms. Soccer Moms. Football Moms. Softball Moms. Neighbor moms. Run-a-marathon-with me Moms. Hiking Mom's. Spanish speaking sister-in-law Moms that spoil me every time we visit Mexico. Friends that I have known since Jr. High-Mom's. Girlscout Moms. Scrapbook Moms. Moms that can be jealous with me about the other Mom's who workout/work/look good/and have 10 kids Moms. Sister-Mom's: they're also my best friends. And the last and never least: my own Mom. There are some seasons I know I wouldn't be strong without their support. I need them all.

I'm horrible about remembering quotes, but there's one about staying connected to the "vine": when the storms come, we would break without the support of others wrapped all around us.

I love helpful people....and they are rare to find in these times. I had a lovely cashier actually work with me and my insane stack of coupons to help me earn my free movie tickets. The deal was you had to buy 10 specific items that qualify and a free movie ticket would print out. Well I wanted 2 tickets not one, (like I'm going by myself), so I purposely found 20 things, (and as always, I had coupons for each and every item). I've done deals like this before and have learned to not buy a bunch of stuff you really don't need, and I was lucky that every item I bought happened to be something we use regularly...like toilet paper and french fries. The problem was that it was a limit of one free movie ticket per deal, so she had to ring up 10 items, and then had to start another separate order for the other 10. Well when you have a stack of 25 or so coupons, and a 3 year old who is sick of sitting in a grocery cart car seat belt, there really is no time to figure out which coupon goes with each different order. But this rock-star cashier lady really went the extra mile to sort my coupons out even though I was holding up her line. I was also sorry for the elderly couple behind me that were patiently waiting and though I kept apologizing to them, they kept telling me they were impressed and wanted to learn how I do what I do.

There's more to deals than just coupons. Since I have a few grocery stores I visit weekly, I've also learned who the cool cashiers are and who aren't...who are smart, and those who really should just run the self check lanes. My basic rule of thumb I live by, is to pick the lane with the male manager or the high school guy...even if it means waiting a little longer. They take every coupon. I have also discovered that most women cashiers are more likely to hand your coupon back to you if it doesn't work or stand there and analyze it for 4 minutes, call in a supervisor, and then still hand your coupon back to you. On occasion I run into extreme coupon Nazi's, and once was told I could be responsible for them losing their job if they didn't make sure each and every one of my coupons match up. I never forget a rude cashier. And if they can't pronounce my last name, they shouldn't ask for it, #1: because they won't remember me, and #2: I'll make sure to avoid their lane next time anyway.

I clearly spend a big part of my life figuring out grocery deals. I think even if I were wealthy, I'd still watch for sales...my conscience wouldn't allow me to buy milk at $2.99 when another store had it on sale for $1.58. I might be a little freakish for all this, but I'm tempted to save my reciepts from a year and figure out my total savings. I've noticed that I usually always save over 65%. In these times, I don't think there's anything insane about saving $2000 a year on groceries just by using coupons...especially for a family of 6 living off of one income. On this visit I bought about 30 items and spent only about $40....AND earned my 2 free movie tickets!! I really believe it pays off to spend a few minutes reading the grocery store ads every Wednesday, cut coupons on Sunday, and then match up coupons with the sales.

The best things in life aren't always free, or easy, but if you can save a few bucks on grocery expenses....that's a total bonu$!

I'm lovin my boys this week. No particular reason, except that I just adore them at both their ages right now.

Today Aydan had a double header for his football team, and he scored twice and grabbed 9 flags!! We weren't sure he knew how to play, but he sure did today!! They both make me laugh and amuse me with their crazy games they play. This week, my dream for them came true, as we finally splurged on a trampoline for them to jump away their energy on. Outside. The hot weather is coming and I don't think my couch can take any more of their leaps and kung fu bouncing. Another fun surprise is that a good friend of ours gave us their kid's jeep cruiser. I don't know the right name for it once again, but it's battery operated and is a kid version of a golf cart...(what every kid dreams of having!) So between the Jeep, the trampoline, the fort building, the light saber fights, the lego building, Star wars Wii, and zorro dress-up, they sure know how to find something to do!

I also hadn't taken them out to a movie in a while, and thought it would be fun to see How to Train Your Dragon with them. All I had to do was buy them popcorn and a huge icee to share, and they didn't ask for anything until it was over! And wow...What a great movie! I think I've always been fascinated with the idea of flying and the Dreamworks people really know how to entertain us with the idea of that experience! We're looking forward to a seeing a lot of new movies coming out this summer too...and I like the idea that I get to see a few of them with my boys!

I'm beginning to love Arizona. I'm probably saying that now, because it's April and this is our "bragging season" with the temperature only reaching the upper 70's while the nights are still cool enough to wear a jacket. When it starts reaching 117degrees in July, is about the time when I start considering other options of where might be a better place to move...but I try to remember to remind myself that for the 6 months of blazing heat we have to endure through, we also get 6 months of "perfection" to make up for it.

It was abso-freaking-lutely beautiful where I hiked with my friend today. Without a cloud in sight, the morning sun seemed to bring out the natural beauty of the wildflowers that are really making a statement this month. I've lived in Arizona for almost 7 years now, so I know that if you don't take the chance to get out and see them, you will totally miss it. The hot fuschia pink flowers are just blooming off the cactuses...(I refuse to say "cacti", which is the correct plural of cactus, because some words are just lame to me)...and the splashes of purples, yellows, oranges, and white against the green color of the spiky cactusES proves to me that only God knows how to make the best bouquets. There were also groups of butterflies chasing each other and birds chirping all around that made it feel like I was in a fairyland.

Of course I forgot my camera, so I won't be able to post pictures until I learn how to download them off of my cell phone....which also captured another amazing find. We found a 10 pound desert tortoise on our hiking path! My friend moved him under a shady tree and hoped when we came back down she could bring it home. At the rate it was moving when we found it we never would have imagined it would have gotten far, and I'm guessing maybe it didn't like the idea of moving to a new home so he figured out a way to hide. It's shell was the same color of the rocks, and it's obvious he had some skills in the art of camoflauge. I have seen a few coyotes in the desert, but I have yet to see a scorpion, or a rattlesnake, or a tarantula...but of all things today: a desert land tortoise!! (A.K.A.: A turtle!!)

So I'm hoping I can get out a few more times before Arizona turns into an oven soon. I'm getting more interested in learning the names of the mountains and their "secret" paths, the desert plant life, and yes, even learn a few actual names of the several different species of birds that I've been "informed" live here. But until I can get comfortable with saying big words like Cacti, strawberry hedgehog, globemallow, and brittlebush, I might have to rely on my expert mother to keep me informed....(she's smarter than google!) I might have seen a pair of golden eagles gliding at the top of the mountain I hiked today...which is just another reason I think we should be allowed to brag about for living in Arizona.