Vida. Risa. Amor.

It's usually November during Thanksgiving time that reminds us to think of all we're thankful for. It must take more practice, because I think I almost went through a season where I've forgotten how to be thankful. I've been trying to change the way I think about the things I "have to do", to the reminder that I "get to do" them. My life seems both simple and complex in being a "stay-at-home-Mom"....(though I don't agree with that title, because being a Mom doesn't always require you to stay home). For too long I've been worried or pressured into our culture's way of thinking we're all supposed have or be something more....more....more. I've had enough of that stress. I had a reality check when my 3 year old was tugging on my arm while I was on the computer demanding that I help him zip up his pants. My reply at first was, "is that all you think I'm here for?"....and after I thought about it, it's true. I am exactly that person to be here for little details like that: to vacuum up all the popcorn seeds off the couch, to have lunch ready when the kids come home from school, to hang up Christmas decorations, to help the kids plan sleepovers with friends, the list goes on and on. It's not that I just have to do those things, it's that I realize I am privelaged to be able to be the one to get to do them. I often think ahead to see the down the road my family is on and it's going at such a fast pace! I hope to make a better effort to make the most out of the time I am given with my family, to stress less, laugh more, and to live thankful.

I spent my entire Sunday cleaning & organizing with the hope that it would get the family ahead for the week. Well, now it's Monday morning, and I'm pretty sure my good intentions backfired. I don't really enjoy writing about the stresses of motherhood, but it is possible I might look back on days like today and realize how "easy" life actually is right now....meaning, that it sometimes scares me that the older my kids get, the harder life might get later on down the road. With that positive outlook stated, the basic mood I am feeling right now is frustration. As a parent I try to set "rules" in the hopes that my kids will actually obey me and understand that I care. I can remember the very last thing I told Josie last night was to make sure she called me when she got to the bus stop this morning. (She is determined to walk to a farther away bus stop where her friends go, which is fine, but we just want to make sure that she let's us know each morning that she gets there safe and sound). No messages were left on my cell phone or home phone today...though I'm sure if I checked I'd see texts in the hundreds from the weekend between her and her friends. Lanie was up late Sunday night doing homework when I saw her all afternoon playing football with her buddies outside, all the while claiming she didn't have much homework to do. Also, she decided to show me her progress report Monday morning which had an F on it for writing. She had many side notes scribbled on it apologizing for the bad grade, and "please don't be mad Mom, I'll fix this!"....So basically she was waiting for the last second to show me the bad news. On the way to take the kids to school I realized that I had never gone through Aydan's back pack and found about 15 practice books I was supposed to be practicing with him over the weekend on, plus a newsletter with his new spelling words, and a lunch box with his rotten leftovers in it. Someone really should have told me that it is a part time job helping a first grader keep up with homework!! So back to home with dishes piled up in the sink, laundry waiting in the washer to be thrown in the dryer, and a bagillion other things to still get done, my 3 year old for some reason wet his pants again and is screaming at me to fix it. I love my kids. I really, really, really do, and I usually like a good challenge. But I'm exhausted and emotional, and tonight it would probably be in everyone's best interest to have their Dad deal with them while I figure out a way to make myself disappear!

Usually people reflect at the end of the year of all the different things they've done or accomplished, but I've spontaneously found myself in a moment in November where I'm able to ponder life a little. We're absolutely, positively, with out a doubt, in the busiest season I've ever seen my family in. I finally get why people have loads and loads of their kids wallet sized school and sport photos stuffed in drawers....it's because who has the time to sit and cut them up and then pass them out anymore!! Aydan just finished up his football season and was so excited about getting his very first trophy. Just this past Saturday I watched Aydan's game at 8, Lanie's game at 2, then Josie's game at 4....(it was also a tournament weekend for Josie so she had 2 more games on Sunday). I honestly LOVE watching my kids play. I get chills just watching Lanie make it around the bases or making a big crack at the ball, or Aydan quickly grab a flag and hold it high in the air for his "fans" to see, and Josie doing her "messy" soccer moves with such serious speed. I should probably be doing better with my half marathon training, but I'd rather sit and watch my kids play any day. I switched my plan of doing a full marathon to a half since doing a full marathon is just way too much of a time and energy commitment right now. I figured I've been a Mom for 13 years, as it is also my 13th wedding anniversary in a couple weeks...so maybe 13 is my "lucky" number this year. Sports will probably always be a huge part of my family's life and I'm reminded to be thankful that my kids live in a climate where it's 85 degrees in November so they can keep playing games they love.